Ask For Feedback

 People are living their lives unconsciously most of the time. You are doing actions daily, then after a period of time your daily actions becomes habits. Then your habits manages your life. Unfortunately you are focused too much on your daily routine that you are not aware of your strengths and weaknessess. The only way to become aware of ourselves is the seek feedback from our friends, family members and all people in general. 

There is a misconception about feedback. Most of the time people perceive feedback as an attack to their pride. No one likes the person who tells you about your mistakes and faults. We consider him or her as an enemy. For that reason our friends and family members avoid giving feedback to us, because we see their feedback as a personal attack to our ego. Therefore we counter attack or at least try to defend ourselves by finding excuses about our mistakes and weaknessess. Only people who tell our mistakes to our face are our enemies. Maybe they are honest enough to tell our weaknesses to us. For that reason we have taken them as enemies because they are telling the bitter truth to us which we never ever want to hear.

The moment we change our thinking about feedback our lives will turn around. Just imagine. You ask your friend to give you feedback. He or she will tell you all your mistakes, faults and weaknesses. This way you will be aware of yourselves. Because you are unable to see yourself from the eyes of others. 

When you learn your mistakes and flaws, then you will be able to change them. For example: if you have the bad habit of interrupting people while they are speaking, your friend will inform you about this bad behaviour. This way you will be aware of your flaw, then you will take action not to interrupt others while that are speaking. Most of the time we do not know our mistakes. Our friends will not tell you about your mistakes in order not to offend you. Unfortunately you would live your whole life with your mistakes and flaws without being aware of them. There will be people that will hate you for your bad habits. You wil be amazed why they are hating you for nothing. In reality nothing happens without a reason. Everything has a cause. Your bad behaviour has caused them to hate you. 

Getting feedback from others and using it to change your bad behaviours in one of the most beneficial actions you would ever take. This way you can change yourself in a positive way. One by one your bad habits will be replaced by the positive ones. Of course this requires self discipline and hard work. You have to believe in yourself too. That change is possible.

                                                         Solomon H.